Tuesday 24 January 2012

We all just Love to Hate

"Why the fuck do the Vampires sparkle!"

A few weeks ago I was sitting in my room, searching the Netflix archives to try and find a movie that would quench my entertainment thirst for an hour or two. Luckily, Netflix updates on a fairly regular basis which means that the "New to Netflix" section is always ripe with film flavored fruit. 

So, after skimming the new content, I got a blast from the past when I saw the sci-fi action fuckup also known as Ultraviolet sneering out at me. Anyone who knows me well is fully aware that I have a hate so deep for Ultraviolet that, on occasion, my eyes bleed (out of hate). 

Umbrella fucked up again

Why do I hate it so much, you ask? Well cause it's fucking terrible. The plot line makes no sense, the special effects are made out of paper-mache molded by an autistic centipede without any legs, so many powers that Violet has are completely unexplained, most action scenes are stoopid and what the fuck is with the gay roundabout scene. 

Ok I've gotta ctfd. Back to the point. 

I watched it anyway. Why would I do that? I hate this movie with the very core of my being, so much that if I had the choice to damn my soul to an eternity in a room with a moose just to have every last copy, recording, file and trace of this movie erased from existence, I would. 

But, that's just it. I love hating it. 

I need the movie to be there, because I can never be as hateful towards anything else than I can towards Ultraviolet. It's as if everything I stand for is further reinforced by the pathetic display that is Ultraviolet. I hate it, but I love hating it. 

And it's not just me. How many people watched Friday a few hundred times before they were done hating it. Not me, cause if it wasn't banned I would still watch it just to make sure I still hate it. 

Yesterday was thursday

Same with Twilight. Me, personally, I don't hate Twilight. But hating Twilight has almost become as popular as liking it. No one likes it when some oestrogen overloaded bitch makes one of the most feared mythic creatures hide away during the day because they sparkle. But, Twilight hate has reached a whole other level easily on par with it's popularity. 

Sry Spike

But, how can we say that this is not normal. I'm sure that hate is as instinctual to humans as love. Without hate, we would not be able to push ourselves to the brink of our capabilities to destroy it. If we couldn't hate, then we would understand our enemies. If we understand our enemies, then we can relate to them. Once we relate to something, it's far harder to destroy it. 

Now, I know that humanity has moved passed this phase (at least it should have). But, for me it's as good an explanation as any to why hating feels so good. As animals, we hated to survive and now we hate to write blog posts. Maybe hating is healthy. 

All I know is that I hate Ultraviolet. And I love it. 


Bandit
COMBUSTION COMPLETE

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